After a much needed hiatus…I have decided “it is time”. Let this newest entry serve as my triumphant return to blogging. So many times I have thought about a topic or an issue that I was eager to write about, but time did not permit for its expression.
It’s funny because I only wrote a few entries before I felt the pressure of obligation building and building, until the sheer magnitude of this unseen influence became so overwhelming that I just could not bring myself to sit down and begin again – even the thought was just “too much”. Welcome to the experience of living in my head. Haha!
And yet, it is that exact experience that brings me back to this place. There exists in my head a compulsion to express thoughts in words, to give life to my imagination and infuse logic into the emotion. But it all takes time. It takes time to organize the thoughts, to focus the energy, form the correct words, and finally to instruct the physical process of typing out the expression. Sounds exhausting, doesn’t it? Such is life with a brain injury.
But I’ve already written about that…the time that goes into the processing takes up 75% of my energy and resources in any given day. And, as a result of that, life takes a different shape and structure in my world. I am reminded that I have also written about the need for an awareness of limitation, and an acceptance of the same. What a weird management of daily resources to succeed in creating a sense of balance in life! And yet, I think that’s exactly what has to happen in order for any of us to achieve an ultimate sense of satisfaction in life.
It’s a journey…life, I mean. And we will never “arrive”, in the sense that we acquire the ultimate enlightenment or the ever elusive state of “happiness” or perfect balance. But I do think we can find a place of contentedness or joy on this journey. Amidst the acknowledgement of genuine emotion and a decided conviction of thought, there is a balance in awareness that happens and an acceptance of being that allows for an appreciation of life. Our perspective becomes altered. We begin to interpret the world differently – without judgement, but a genuine recognition of what is.
And that’s where I’m at today. I hope to be bringing quite a few more regular entries before I feel the need to “take a break” again. I look forward to the ongoing interaction that happens as a result of these ramblings, and I hope that my words encourage even just a few to allow the journey to be exactly that.
…this is my life…